Connecting Space

Connecting Space

Fathers Day

Fathers Day

Once a year we are asked to give thought to our fathers, to celebrate their role in our lives.

This draws the question. How has your relationship or non relationship with your father /dad impacted on you? What influence has your relationship with dad, his legacy, had and still having on your relationships in the present day.

Has this relationship enabled you or disarmed you? Encouraged or disrupted? Left you feeling loved or ?

I hope that this space will be given to reflect upon the variety of influences a parent can have on our lives and what we are left with.

Thinking out-loud


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Author: Jill • Filed under: Relationship Matters • Posted: June 13, 2008 10:37 pm


  1. Dear Jill,
    I am thinking out loud, too. I both hated and wanted something, I’m not sure what, from my dad. My older brother called him a ‘tin pot god’ in the home – he enjoyed having power over us. He was always quizzing me on my times table of mathematical questions .. it’s no wonder I have major problems with figures, dyslexic, I would say.
    Yet there are parts of me that honour his traits I find in myself. He had a shy smile. Also one of his dictum’s was ‘waste not want not’. I have adapted this to my lifestyle through the years, and of course because of the ecological revolution in the present, I’m quite sure he and his mother before him are grinning and nodding their heads beyond the grave.
    I will go on reflecting.

  2. My dad committed suicide when I was 19 months old. I felt very sad when I found out -my mum told me when I was 17 that he had died in this way. I remember not knowing what to do or to think. I didn’t know what to do with the hurt I was feeling. I just carried on as though I was ok, but I wasn’t. It is difficult to say what feelings I have towards my dad because I never knew him and he never knew me, but then that was his choice. The way I see it now is that we could all choose that way out as it were, but few of us would actually do it. I have a blank memory of him, a blank where he should be.

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